writing

Rise

I was supposed to be a ray of sunshine. I wanted to be everything you needed. I wanted to fill you with light so that you may always know which way to go, and that light would always lead you back to me. For so long I tried to give you my light. You brought your storms to me and I cast them away like a shadow, for it didn’t fit into the landscape of sunlight I had in our forecast.

For days it rained. It poured and the only light in the entire landscape was brought about by quick flashes of lightning. I called out for you, screaming at the top of my wind filled lungs, only to be drown out by the earth-shaking claps of thunder. I dug at the muddy ground, pulling apart the flooded flowers that were once fed by the sunshine brought about by our smiles, and cried out. I sobbed until my throat was drier than a desert, holding onto a glimmer of hope that as my tears exhaust so would the storm, but nature rarely works in our favor.

For what felt like days, I sat in the storm tensely. The wind made it impossible to escape, anything I once held on to was violently stripped from my being. All that I had was lost. There was no sunshine, it wasn’t within me. I had given it all to you and you ran with it. I was lost. I was stuck. I was grounded in the dirt from which the tall trees that were the only things left to protect me grew. Looking from the ground, I traced the roots until they disappeared underground. I want to disappear, I thought, I want to follow the roots until no one can rip me of anything like this storm and you have. So, I dug. I dug until my nailbeds were soiled with dirt and my back ached. The rain continued to pelt my skin with heavy drops and the sound of the thunder sounded closer and closer with each passing moment, but I had yet to waver like the branches that swayed with the violent gusts. I dug until I was rooted in the depths of the warm Earth like the trees were, where the water had yet to reach. No longer would the thunder shake me. No longer would the wind strip me of all I owned. I was rooted now, no one would forsake me. It was time for me to rise, sunshine or not, I would rise.

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